Day 70: Gleaning Wisdom

Wow... 70 days... You know, since I update everyday I don't want to post really long drawn out posts, however, as you may have noticed, I do enjoy a post of depth occasionally.

Lately I've seen a lot of things referencing being happy in life and I think that this trend has become more popular, and that makes me consider where we are as a society in our states of happiness. I'm not sure if it's just become the sudden desire and awareness that life should be spent pursuing happiness, or if it's because we've found ourselves in unhappy times and have the desire to change that, but either way, I think it's a healthy movement.

I saw this article on my Facebook feed a few days ago:
Top 5 Regrets of the Dying
I took a glance at it and immediately loved it.  Much like the article on 7 Habits of Extremely Happy People, this article brought up some things that I agree with whole heartedly.

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Reading these regrets really made me think about where I am with them. 

Number 1: I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

Having courage to live a life true to self really resounds for me.  As we grow older in life, move on, start new chapters, we change. When we return to a place where someone knew us previously we may have a natural instinct to revert back to who we were before. We may have a desire to live up to their expectations as we move on and I think it's extremely important and valuable to be true to self since we will never please everybody around us. I'm glad I'm at least aware of this, and can work to examine myself to make sure I'm happy with what I'm doing and not just trying to make someone else happy.  After all Socrates even said, "The unexamined life is not worth living."

Number 2: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

In a society where workaholism is readily recognized (my spellcheck even acknowledges the word, for crying out loud), and even accepted in some social circles, I think this is a great piece of wisdom to glean from those who have lived longer lives than ourselves.  

While on my travel pursuits of self and life, I had a conversation with one of my mentors where I told her some prospective job opportunities. I presented one as, "This sounds fun but I'm not sure if... that's right..." She was ready to remind me that life is meant to be fun and work is a part of life.  So why should work not be fun? So she asked why, if the opportunity presents itself, why I project a negativity towards it? I think she is wise, she is a mentor of mine after all, and here it came up again from a generation of people I see as wiser in life. 

In our generation I think most of us are trying to find our purpose in this life - it gets confusing, we experience transitions, we are presented with choices, and ultimately it can become overwhelming.  I think if we can somehow tap into this line of thinking that work should be fun, life should be light hearted and we should take advantage of opportunities that will bring us joy, I think we'd be a lot better off. I know this is one I will definitely work to pursue as time goes forward.

Number 3: I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Wow.  Courage to express feelings. If that doesn't touch my heart strings, then shoot. I find most people live in fear of rejection. We are afraid of being rejected by others so we go back to the flaws we feel regarding the first regret: Pleasing others.

I tend to pride myself in my honesty, but simply because I am honest doesn't mean I say everything that comes to mind. Just over the last year and a half I've been in more situations where expressing my feelings was more imperative and I may not have given a gold star performance in my efforts - but I made the effort. Certainly there are some feelings I am still afraid to express, but I'm proud of the ones I have.

Number 4: I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Well.. I'm bad at this.  So I guess I need to be better. I have been trying, but I will work harder.  Thank you, wise people, for reminding me of things I need to be working on.  Always.

Number 5: I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Shoot son, well that's what this blog is about, so I feel like I'm on a good path. We all deserve happiness.  I hope you are also working to allow yourself to be happier.

And seriously, I still don't know who reads this blog but every time I'm on my home screen I see so many more views.  WEIRD.  If you have a blog, let me know, I love collaboration - and I obviously enjoy reading blogs and articles.

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P.S. See day 57 on No Regrets for even more in relation to this.